3 Tips for Raising Teenagers

Hello!  I am so glad you’re here!   We all can use some help when it comes to raising our families and I am beyond excited to share with you what I think are my best tips for raising teenagers. Pull up a chair!

You have teenagers.  I get it.

I’m now a grandmother and went through three teenagers myself and now I have something to say about it.  And boy, hang in there with me till we get to Tip #3!

My personal favorite.  Or should I  say my personal pet peeve.

It makes me get my granny panties in a knot.

But enough of that.  Let’s get started with my tips. Oh wait, before I get started I wanted to mention that I don’t have any studies, surveys, scientific proof or medical evidence to back up what I’m saying.  I am just going to tell you the three best things that worked for me which sometimes I think is the best advice anyway.  Just sayin.

Allrightee, here we go:

Tip #1 – Be Physically Affectionate

There is a point when your baby is no longer a baby and becomes a toddler.  When they are a baby, you can kiss and slurp on them all you want.

And then they become mobile.

And it’s hard to keep them still.

Still enough so that you can cuddle them and kiss them like you did when they were a baby.

So in order to circumvent not wanting to be kissed as much, my husband and I would kiss our kids and then say “You better not wipe that kiss off!”  Which of course they promptly did, giggling with laughter as they did so.  Then of course, we would have to kiss them again and again say  “You better not wipe that kiss off!”

Lather, rinse, repeat.

It works wonders so that now we are doing the same thing with our grandchildren.

When my son was 6, I was diagnosed with breast cancer which is a whole other story, but one night during that time I went to put him to bed and I kissed him goodnight.

To which he promptly took his hand and wiped it off.

Memories came flooding back of when he was littler and I said to him “Did you just wipe that kiss off?!”

His answer was priceless.

“No, mom.  I was rubbing it in.”

PARENTS – THIS IS THE KEY!

We need to rub our love into our kids.

By being physical and affectionate with them.

Especially teenagers.

They might act like they don’t want it, or they don’t like it and it might look like they are wiping it off.

Rub it in anyway.

They might tell you to leave them alone or to go away.  They may even tell you that they hate you.

Rub it in anyway.

When I was a teenager myself, one of my friends was really, really mad at her mother.  She had taken multiple pieces of paper and on each one wrote “I hate my mom!” and then posted them all over the walls of her bedroom.

After school that day, imagine what my friend must have felt like when she entered her room and everywhere that she had posted “I hate my mom!” was a new card replaced by her mother that said “I love you Ann.”

Love motivates a change in behavior more than anger.

So hug them, kiss them, sit  next to them, heck even punch them in the arm but be physically affectionate with them. Physical touch connects you with them in ways that nothing else can.  It conveys your love on a different level and reinforces the other ways in which you should be showing your love.  Like telling them.  More on that later.

My son (the one who rubbed my kiss in) will tell you that when he was growing up when I went to wake him up in the morning, that I would steam-roll him in bed.  It’s ok to be a little rougher with boys!  Like punching them in the arm. Or a steam roll. It doesn’t have to be mushy to work with boys!

And speaking of boys, it is SO important that parents are physical and  affectionate with their boys. Girls tend to be more naturally affectionate so boys need this more than ever.

Rub it in.

Tip #2